Friday the 13th: Bonus Review

Bonus review from one of Railing Seat's own. Ivan watched and wrote the review for this movie in Croatia.

Ivan says:
I was nearly fooled into thinking it was Jason, but I like the real one better
Ivan says:
During the opening scene where he hangs the victim in the sleeping bag to a tree, I thought they were paying homage to one of Jason's most grizzly and badass kills of all-time.
Ivan says:
I was wrong. What was wrong with this kill? Jason doesn't torture victims by burning them alive. He smashes their faces in with hammers and impales them while having sex with harpoons.
Ivan says:
Umm, correction. He kills them with harpoons while having sex. Sex with harpoons doesn't really work.
Ivan says:
Oh yeah, hostages? WTF is that? And don't sell me that crap about her looking like his mom and him keeping her alive for that reason.
Ivan says:
Jason has never been, and will never be about some "deeper meaning". This director is also the jagoff who directed 2003's remake of Texas Chainsaw Massacre.
Ivan says:
Thus, it only makes sense that he got some of the footage scrambled while putting together the final cut of Friday the 13th.
Ivan says:
Jason's house? Al is right. Jason doesn't have, nor need a lair and I sure as heck don't want to see it
Ivan says:
I have a lot more to say, but I just made myself sick thinking of all the things that went wrong.'
Ivan says:
4 stars. I would give it 4.5, but the jackass kids in the front row were extra annoying. Croats don't believe that silence is golden.