New Moon

tony says:
before we start i just want all the readers to know.. that i decided to watch this movie for the greater good... for the website.. and for that i should be classified a sort of modern day hero
tony says:
i would also like to point out that shellie watched this twice.. so she could refresh her memory and contribute to the review.
Shellie says:
Ummm not really. I made you watch it. That kind of makes you a pushover.
tony says:
and she just made fun of me. so im taking that credit back
Shellie says:
!!!! That is just low!
tony says:
i was giving you props!
Shellie says:
I take my comment back too...we did it for the greater good. QED.
tony says:
well played
tony says:
well played
Shellie says:
Okay Tony Two Times....what did you think?
tony says:
i don't at all know where to begin
Shellie says:
Because that's how boring this piece of crap was?
tony says:
i think that this was one of the few times where having live studio audience noises would have helped this film... like it helped full house
Shellie says:
That wouldnt have even helped it.
Shellie says:
I'm sitting here trying to think of something significant to chat about, and the only thing that comes to mind is when Bella flew off the motorcycle and hit her head.
tony says:
i don't even remember that part
Shellie says:
HAHHAHA
tony says:
and i'll agree with you
tony says:
i just think that if there were those OOOOOOH and AAAAAAAAH sounds the audience would make would have at least made this film funny
Shellie says:
*Bella flies off the motorcycle into a rock.* OHHHHHH! *Its okay folks, Bella is only minorly injured.* BOOOOOO!
tony says:
HAHAHAHAHAHA that's the idea!
tony says:
you've read the books... how does this compare?
Shellie says:
Well the books were pretty good. I really did enjoy reading them. But the movies made me hate the books. Honestly, what is the worst part about the movies? The boring bland actors that make me want to punch myself. Those douchebags arent in the books.
tony says:
i guess it's easier to read the books 'cause you can imagine yourself what bella and dumbass look like
tony says:
but they have this struggling face all the time.. it's like their inspiration for their roles were people suffering from constipation
Shellie says:
HAHAHAHHAHA
Shellie says:
Hey Tony...remember when I was rewatching the movie and you defended Edwards body?
tony says:
shellie we promised never to talk about that again
Shellie says:
I think Bella is suffering from a stick up her butt.
Shellie says:
OH!
Shellie says:
We did promise, but it was too epic to not repeat.
tony says:
promise breaker! now i'm going to pout and sit in my room looking out the window for months watching the seasons turn!
Shellie says:
October...November....(Bella please shower)....December....
tony says:
HAHAHA!!! but seriously.. i felt that this movie had no plot.. had nothing really... it made twilight looked good.. ( i vomitted a little there)... and it could've easily been condensed to a 20 min superstation show that aired before dawson's creek
tony says:
somethings i'll just never understand..
tony says:
how this series is so popular is one of them
Shellie says:
No it really did make Twilight look good! The plot was...if your boyfriend dumps you, do crazy irrational things so you can hear voices in your head. And for the record, I never watched Dawson's creek.
Shellie says:
But here's the big topic:
Shellie says:
How much did you love Jacob's abs?!?!?! *SWOON*!
tony says:
did you just swoon?
tony says:
you're part of the problem! not the solution!
Shellie says:
Hey! I am not typically one to get swoon-ish over abs, but even you have to admit that was the only silver lining in this movie!
Shellie says:
At least I'm defending Jacob and not Edward!
tony says:
ok i mean i can understand why girls would go ga ga over Jacob's abs... but there has to be something more than that!
Shellie says:
Something more? Than abs? I don't comprehend this.
tony says:
again.. part of the problem, not the solution! haha
Shellie says:
Haha...no I'm mostly mocking!
tony says:
what did you think of the ending? was it what happened in the book?
Shellie says:
Yes it's exactly what happened in the book. Sheer stupidity. And the part where they led children and the elderly in so the volturi could eat them? Hardly appropriate for young eyes!
tony says:
that part contributed nothing at all to the plot (which already was moronic).. all it did was show that vampires kill people
tony says:
no effing crap
Shellie says:
It also showed that the Volturi looked like a bunch of creepy homeless people that wear makeup.
tony says:
yes! what's up with that?
Shellie says:
But yes. Stupid ending to an even stupider movie.
tony says:
ok look readers.. very simple.. edward asks bella to marry him at the end of the movie.. dont waste your time or money for an almost 2 hr proposal
Shellie says:
DID YOU JUST SPOIL THE PROPOSAL?!
tony says:
i'm against spoiling endings.. and i never want to do it.. so its kinda a first
tony says:
and i;m gonna do another first
tony says:
i'm not going to give this movie a rating out of 10... because if i do.. i'm acknowledging that i recognize it as a movie.. which i don't..
Shellie says:
HAHAHA. So what are you going to do then?
tony says:
beg people to let the fact that i watched this movie not be in vain.. learn from this.. and cease watching this series
tony says:
will you rate this film?
Shellie says:
But that's not going to happen! Because I'm going to make you watch Eclipse with me too!
Shellie says:
Yes. I will rate it.
tony says:
oh i know! and i will ultimately buckle.. and watch.. woe is me
Shellie says:
And you say I'm part of the problem.
tony says:
sigh.. rate this already and lets never speak of new moon again
Shellie says:
Fine. -10 bajillion/10
tony says:
i think i hate you
Shellie says:
But it's a minus sign!
tony says:
OH
Shellie says:
I thought you were a math whiz!
tony says:
my apologies!
Shellie says:
I am shaking my head at you
tony says:
and i'm groveling for your forgiveness
tony says:
one more thing! did you notice how bella talks like this in the movie:
tony says:
edward i........ think........... that.......... i have............ to............ go to............. school............ today
Shellie says:
YES!
tony says:
SO annoying
Shellie says:
edward....its...my...........birthday.
tony says:
shellie i .......... hate ......... this.............. mo..........vie...............................................................so.......................m..............uch
Shellie says:
ouch..........i..........cut........myself............NOOOOO.....jasper!


The Chelios Heart Award
Shellie's Pick: Bella's dad for putting up with a nutty daughter.
Tony's Pick: shellie for watching this twice

Line of the Movie:
Shellie: "Pain"
Tony: "please just kill me" - tony